


Can you finally see me?

by jikookball



Category: No Fandom
Genre: Anal Sex, Best Friends, Boys In Love, Depression, Falling In Love, First Love, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Forbidden Love, High School, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Love Confessions, Love Triangles, M/M, Middle School, References to Depression
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-17
Updated: 2021-01-17
Packaged: 2021-03-15 19:46:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 18,096
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28818738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jikookball/pseuds/jikookball
Summary: After moving to America Hyunwoo discovers his sexuality and has to make a life changing choice.





	Can you finally see me?

Hyunwoo walked through the doors of this unfamiliar place with a smile on his face. Out of all the times that he'd moved he was most content with this one. He hated Gwanju to say the least and starting a new jn Los Angeles sparked his interest. Although he was outside the city he still felt immersed in the heat and culture of America. He spent 2 years there and was relentlessly bullied. He was a tall and skinny kid and before in Gwanju he was just skinny. He was the bbang shuttle and it wasn't fun to say the least. He basically begged to move and it finally happened. His smile was still plastered on his face as he ran up the stairs to start 7th grade. In America there was no bbang shuttle and he couldn't wait to finally have a normal day at school.

Hyunwoo stopped in front of his locker and began to unload his things. He looked around for a moment when a shy boy caught his eye. He was shorter than Hyunwoo and looked nice enough for Hyunwoo to talk to.

"Hello, what's your name? I'm Hyunwoo." Hyunwoo almost shouted out a nervousness and excitement. The boy looked up from his things and seemed to glare at Hyunwoo. Hyunwoo only looked at him and cocked his head to the side.

"I'm Sungmin." The boy was barely audible for Hyunwoo to hear and he smiled brighter hearing the boy speak for the first time. The first bell rang and the boy scurried away to his class. Hyunwoo watched him silently and went to his first class, his smile already starting to fade.

At lunch Hyunwoo sat next to a random group of people and began socializing the best he could.

"You know that I'm better than you in overwatch right?" One of them asked. He looked nice and was korean just like him. In fact the table he sat at had all asians sitting there and he wondered if it was intended to be like that. Hyunwoo thought it was his time to shine as he loved gaming and especially overwatch.

"Oh really I play overwatch too. My main is Bastion." Hyunwoo smiled at the boys at his table and their eyes lit up.

"Yeah, my main widowmaker. I bet I could beat you in a 1v1." The boy next to him spoke and nudged him casually. He was slightly shorter than Hyunwoo and it was subtle went they sat down. He had brown hair that almost hid his eyes and a cut jawline. He had dimples and was good-looking. 

"What's your name?" The one across from him asked. He was thinner than the rest of them, but he was bright, in the way his smile shined. He had brown hair also and it was shaped into a bowl cut. He had a slender build and his eyes shined bright.

"Hyunwoo." Hyunwoo said with a tiny smile on his lips meeting new people was a great feeling. 

"I'm Youngjin, that's Minkyu and this is Jun." Hyunwoo nodded feeling a rush of serotonin.

"Nice to meet you guys." 

Minkyu, the boy next to him, nudged him playfully again. "Don't be so formal. You know what we had plans to go to my house after school. You up for it?" Hyunwoo smiled, showing most of his teeth. He tried to act cool though it didn't work despite his efforts.

"That'd be cool." Hyunwoo felt welcomed and their conversation continued. Laughs could be heard from their table as they talked about the game and themselves. Hyunwoo really did feel welcomed.

"Wow this is your house. It's so cool!" Hyunwoo found himself being a bit too nerdy around them but he liked being himself. They were nice people and Hyunwoo liked making new friends.

"Thank you." Minkyu said humbly as they made their way through Minkyu's room. The room was quite spacious and there was a large gaming setup on one wall with a bed across from it. The desk was tucked in the corner. Minkyu didn't use it often and Hyunwoo could tell as it had heaps of dust on it.

"Let's play 2v2 then. Or do you want to get Sungmin over here so we can play 3v3 with a random other person." Jun said, flopping onto Minkyu's bed.

"Sungmin?" Hyunwoo asked. He remembered talking to him in the morning and assumed he was new by the way he talked.

"Yeah, Sungmin transferred here in the last trimester last year." Minkyu said, grabbing 4 controllers. He handed one to all one them and plopped down on the floor across from his laptop screen. They all had separate computers and it made Hyunwoo wonder how he had so many.

"Let's just play 2v2 guys." Youngjin glanced over at Jun then back at Minkyu. Youngjin said that last sentence with a bit of sourness added to it which Hyunwoo decided not to ask about. 

They played until it was almost dark and Jun and Youngjin walked Hyunwoo halfway home until they reached their own houses. The sun was setting and Hyunwoo basked in the scenery of his new home. 

The first trimester passed and Hyunwoo, Minkyu, Jun, and Youngjin had become best friends. Min, Jun and Youngjin already were best friends and it felt good to hang around with them. They played games together, laughed at lunch, and got detention for talking too much. Hyunwoo began to talk more to Sungmin too. It felt good to speak to Sungmin and it felt like he was opening up to him finally. Sungmin was becoming a better friend as time went on and he spent more and more time with him too. 

"Hyunwoo, help me with this." Sungmin whispered. Hyunwoo glanced at him. It was science and they shared the same class. A class they had shared since the start of the year, also where Hyunwoo would subconsciously stare at Sungmin. Hyunwoo nodded sleepily. He thought this class was boring and the only thing that made it fun being seated right next to Sungmin.

"Sure, if you hang out with me after school." Hyunwoo hummed and leaned closer to Sungmin to look at his notebook.

"Ok, we're going to your house though." Hyunwoo smiled and looked over the problem silently. 

Hyunwoo sat at lunch where he always sat and socialized with his friends like nothing had changed. And nothing did change.

"Can I sit here?" Sungmin asked his tray clutched in his hands. Hyunwoo turned around and saw Sungmin standing there silently. Youngjin glanced at Minkyu and Jun in which they responded with a cocking their head to the side in confusion. Hyunwoo didn't notice his friends telepathically talking and was so focused on Sungmin.

"Of course." Jun finally said. Youngjin looked at him with angry eyes and went back to eating. Sungmin sat down next to Hyunwoo, their shoulders pressing together. Hyunwoo's friends went back to talking about overwatch when Hyunwoo subconsciously started another conversation with Sungmin, feeling he was slightly left out of the conversation.

"What do you want to do when we get to my house?" Hyunwoo asked nervously, playing with his sleeves. 

"Let's see when we get there." Hyunwoo smiled nodding his head. They began to talk with the group again after a few minutes.

"You have to kick it! You can't touch it with your hands Sungmin!" Hyunwoo joked, pushing Sungmin playfully. Hyunwoo wrapped his arms around Sungmin and sneakily kicked the ball into Sungmin's imaginary goal. It was like they were kids again and Hyunwoo's backyard was as big as a soccer field. Hyunwoo hadn't known Sungmin was good in sports as he was lighting fast, maybe even faster than him. Hyunwoo was great in soccer and he planned on forming a team from the scraps athletes in the school. Most people weren't interested in soccer and showed more interest in basketball and football.

"That's no fair Hyunwoo! That doesn't count." Hyunwoo tackled Sungmin to the ground. Sungmin fought back kicking his legs and squirming around as sat himself on Sungmin's stomach. Hyunwoo pinned his hands above his head and smiled fondly at the older boy. Sungmin let out a sigh of defeat. Hyunwoo smiled giggling as he rolled off of Sungmin and got onto his two feet. 

"Help me up bum." Sungmin whined. Hyunwoo rolled his eyes and pulled Sungmin up quickly.

"Don't call me bum, bum." Hyunwoo laughed at his stupid words and punched Sungmin's shoulder playfully. He felt himself glance at Sungmin's pants knowing something was there, maybe dirt. It was a boner, Hyunwoo internally smiled which he had no idea the reason he wanted to smile. He just glanced back at Sungmin and they began to play soccer once more.

The second trimester finished along with the first half of the third trimester. Hyunwoo knew summer would come, which he was excited for. He knew he would miss his friends though, especially Sungmin. He was spending more and more time with him. They talked more often at lunch, science, and sometimes after school. After some pleading done by Hyunwoo he got his friends to join the soccer team. Hyunwoo also convinced Sungmin who didn't need much convincing at all and just agreed to Hyunwoo's words. Their season would go on after school until July and their record was rough as Hyunwoo carried the entire team on his back. The record was 2-3 and they all knew they would barely make the playoffs riding on Hyunwoo's back.

"Do you think we'll make the playoffs?" Hyunwoo took a sip of water and glanced at Sungmin who sat close by him.

"Of course. You have me, I have you." Hyunwoo felt heat rush to his cheeks and ignored it. He also ignored the pink tinted on Sungmin's cheeks when he smirked back at him. He turned his head to the empty field. Practice ended and his friends wanted to play overwatch and Hyunwoo insisted he would catch up later. 

"When the season is over, will we see each other before the start of school?" Hyunwoo sparked the spontaneous question that had been stuck in the back of his mind.

"I hope so, I have to run track though Hyunie." Sungmin sighed and leaned on Hyunwoo's shoulder. Hyunwoo nodded and wondered if they would really even talk this summer after the seasons end.

"So what we didn't make it. We made it to the first round together. Next time we will win, don't sulk too long." A smirk showed on Hyunwoo's lips. He was the only one who hadn't been crying. He was somewhat happy with the close score thinking they would do way worse. He tried his best and so did everyone else. He also had to admit the game was a bit of a mess. Minkyu had scored on the wrong goal and it just went downhill from there. Hyunwoo finished his speech and sat next to Sungmin who was wiping his tears away. They sat on the hot asphalt while the winners were cheering. It was ironic how the tables could turn so quickly if they had won. Hyunwoo wrapped his arm around Sungmin's waist bringing him close. He wanted to ease Sungmin even if it was for such a short amount of time. Sungmin grabbed his shirt and used it as a tissue for his tears. Hyunwoo smiled and rubbed Sungmin's back slowly. This moment felt so magical to him and only him.

"Sungmin invited you to go to six flags with him you should go." They sat around the table as they ate dinner as a family. Something they did often even if everyone had work. A smile was visible on Hyunwoo's face again. They hadn't talked since early July and it felt like ages since he talked to Sungmin. Hyunwoo nodded trying to hide his smile by taking a sip of cold soda. 

"What do you want to do first?" Hyunwoo asked scratching the back of his hair. Sungmin brought along one of his friends from school also. He didn't feel uncomfortable but he felt like an intrusion. He didn't want to be left out.

"Woo-sik, what do you think?" Sungmin asked, nudging the boy a bit. Hyunwoo felt a sour feeling in the pit of his stomach and he wanted it to go. Why couldn't it just be him and Sungmin? It made him think badly and overthink, 'did Sungmin hate him now?' 

"The wave pool maybe." Sungmin nodded and smiled at the other boy. Hyunwoo nodded, faking a smile. He didn't understand why he was so jealous yet he did. But he avoided the latter. Hyunwoo just felt out of place, like a scab.

They reached the pool and got in. It was thrilling. Sungmin clinged onto Hyunwoo like a lost puppy and Hyunwoo began to feel more at ease as Sungmin seeked him out for comfort. They got out and went on various water slides. Then the roller coasters for three and Hyunwoo found himself wanting to sit next to Sungmin more than often. Hyunwoo wanted to be used as a shield, maybe for an excuse to touch Sungmin. They even held hands for a while before Sungmin realized and swatted Hyunwoo's hand away with a pink tint on his cheeks.

They finally went home and Hyunwoo slept softly on Sungmin's shoulder in the car ride home.

"Do you ever get bad grades?" Youngjin asked. The 8th grade year had started two days ago and Hyunwoo was at lunch with Minkyu, Jun, and Youngjin like usual. Sungmin sat with Woosik and some other popular kids. It didn't bother Hyunwoo though. He didn't get to talk to Sungmin much after six flags, the end of July and school started on the 20th of August. Hyunwoo didn't let that ruin his summer and spent time with his other friends improving in soccer and playing video games.

"Youngjin you know you get way better grades than me." Hyunwoo giggled knowing Youngjin was failing two classes and the year just started.

"Whatever meanie." Minkyu giggled at Youngjin's words.

"You know you're failing too Minkyu." Minkyu and Jun laughed melodically. Youngjin finally cracked and laughed with them.

"Stop, stop, stop. S-T-O-P stop." Jun yelled and the whole table burst into laughter. Hyun grinned and glanced at Sungmin. His eyes were glued on him. He didn't look happy yet not sad and it confused Hyunwoo more than he wanted it to. He glanced back at Minkyu who was on the floor laughing which made Hyunwoo holler in laughter. 

"Hyunwoo you like someone?" Sungmin was spending a lot more time with Woo-sik and the other kids. Hyunwoo still had fun at school but he was beginning to miss Sungmin. He was paranoid about Sungmin not wanting to be around him and it drove him crazy. He had told his friend's that he liked someone and they teased him, asking who the special lady was. 

"Uhm, yeah." Hyunwoo felt heat go to his cheeks. Hyunwoo still talked to Sungmin but not very often. This one encounter made his heart race.

"Who is it?" Sungmin smiled and clasped his hands together like a gossip girl. Hyunwoo evaded Sungmin's gaze. Knowing Sungmin, Hyunwoo didn't want to tell him. 

"Uhm, can we not talk about this?" Hyunwoo felt himself blushing and knew Sungmin would notice.

"Fine Hyunie. Let's hang out after school today then." Sungmin replied leaning on Hyunwoo's shoulder. They were at their desks before the class started and Hyunwoo knew it was either a bad or good thing that Sungmin sat next to him. Class started and Hyunwoo couldn't help but to look at Sungmin the whole time. 

"Why aren't you talking to me anymore?" Hyunwoo asked at lunch. Sungmin was standing in the center of the lunch room on his phone and they hadn't talked much since going to Hyunwoo's place after school the month before. Sungmin confused Hyunwoo, and they were starting to grow further apart and Hyunwoo found himself unhappy at school. His friends asked him what was wrong and he just shook his head no. He hadn't actually told anyone who he liked and he felt that people thought he was seeking attention by not telling a soul. The truth being that he wasn't, he was actually just afraid. 

"Because, I don't want to talk to you." Sungmin replied, not even turning to look at Hyunwoo. Hyunwoo felt a pain in his heart. How could he not want to talk to him? Did he do something? 

"What do you mean?" Hyunwoo asked again. Did Sungmin not like him anymore?

"I just don't want to talk to you Hyunwoo." Hyunwoo felt tears in his eyes and his heart breaking. He didn't know this could ever happen. Was he overreacting?

"I-I'm sorry-"

"Is that all you have to ask? I thought it was something serious." Sungmin walked away from Hyunwoo going to sit with Woo-sik and the others and lunch. Hyunwoo stood there numbly. What? He dropped his lunch tray right on his feet and ran out the lunch room. It was stupid to do so and it was like he was running away from his stupid problems. He wasn't running away because they followed him persistently. Hyunwoo ran into the empty halls and sat on the floor with his back against the wall. He tried to hold back his tears but they just came flooding out. 

"Guys." Hyunwoo said abruptly while playing Overwatch with his friends. He still thought about Sungmin what he said in the previous hours. 

"What's up?" Minkyu asked. They found him crying and didn't tease him but comforted him rubbing his back gently. He liked that about his friends. They were considerate but also knew how to make a good joke.

"I like Sungmin, Park Sungmin. Can you tell him tomorrow for me?" Hyunwoo knew it was a lot of weight to put on his friends and he didn't know if they would even agree or be freaked out that he liked a guy.

"Sure Hyunwoo." Minkyu replied smiling at the younger. 

"That's why it took you so long to tell us. We don't care that he's a guy Hyunie." Hyunwoo smiled glancing at his friends. 

"Thanks guys." Hyunwoo hugged Jun tightly and Minkyu hugged him from behind. They all cuddled weirdly on Minkyu's bed until they began to play again.

"You told him right?" Hyunwoo almost yelled at the lunch table. Minkyu glanced at Jun who quickly shook his head. Hyunwoo's eyes got bigger as he stared at the two.

"Yeah, he said he doesn't-" Minkyu interrupted by a punch in the stomach inflicted by Jun. Youngjin glanced at Jun then back to Hyunwoo. Why couldn't they tell him? Hyunwoo felt his eyes water, did Sungmin not feel the same?

"Tell me what he said." Hyunwoo's smile was fading a bit but he tried to show it to ease his friends, show them that it was fine.

"He doesn't care." Youngjin blurted. Jun glared at him and balled up his fist threatening him.

"What do you mean he doesn't care? He didn't say anything else?" Hyunwoo felt his tears coming but he held them back. What was the pain he felt in his heart. He couldn't act like he didn't know this was coming.

"He just said that he doesn't care." Hyunwoo stared at Youngjin as he said the words. He didn't want to be here, hearing them tell him his first love didn't feel the same. 

"Ok." Hyunwoo nodded. He didn't understand but tried to understand it. A tear came out and he quickly wiped it away.

"Hey, you okay?" Minkyu whispered, rubbing his back slowly. What could he even say?

"Fine, I don't care either." Hyunwoo huffed. That wasn't true and everyone at the table knew that. But they didn't push and continued to a different subject. Maybe it would make Hyunwoo feel better, but it didn't and Hyunwoo couldn't even explain how he felt.

The first trimester finally passed and Hyunwoo felt the days going by slower and winter came. He felt his fingers numbing to the warmth of the Los Angeles air. His parents even became concerned with Hyunwoo's behavior.

"Hyunwoo, I think you should know this. Sungmin told Woo-shik that you liked him. Woo-shik keeps telling everyone." Donghyun from his homeroom approached him and told him with concern spelled out on his face.

"What?" Donghyun nodded and walked away towards his next class. Hyunwoo felt betrayed but it wasn't like he told Sungmin to keep it a secret. Maybe it was his fault.

"I asked Hyunwoo if he liked any boys and Hyunwoo answered no and said he was straight." One of the boys in his class laughed.

"No, Hyunwoo said that he liked Sungmin." One of the other boys almost yelled. Hyunwoo was right there. It was art class, the class he had Sungmin in. He was talking to Woo-sik on the other half of class. Almost everyone turned their heads and looked at Hyunwoo. Hyunwoo wanted to die. Silence wavered over the class, waiting for Hyunwoo to respond. Hyunwoo wanted to cry but he couldn't. He glanced at Sungmin and just went back to coloring.

"Do you like it? I made her look like me. Sort of right." Hyunwoo showed his drawing to his tablemates and the class began to talk again, most likely gossiping about him.

"Yeah, it looks ugly like you Hyunwoo." Hyunwoo just laughed and went back to coloring his drawing.

"Why isn't Sungmin talking to me Donghyun?" Donghyun was a good friend to Hyunwoo now and it had been a week since the art incident.

"Well I don't want to make you mad." Donghyun looked like he was concerned like he always did when he gave Hyunwoo information.

"Just tell me." Hyunwoo exhaled waiting for the reason.

"Well he told me that you were annoying to him, he felt like you were always looking at him and it was creepy... He also told me that you were, like obsessed with him." Donghyun whispered, not wanting anyone else to hear them. He really liked Hyunwoo and he hated to see him like this.

"Oh." Hyunwoo softly said, his words barely audible. There were so many things raving in his mind and he just wanted to scream. Did Sungmin ever even like him? Was he just leading him on? He didn't want to think he deserved anything from Sungmin, which he didn't. He just felt betrayed, Sungmin could at least talk to him like old times. 

"Are you going home right away? Want to come to my house?" Donghyun asked. Hyunwoo quickly shook his head no and walked past Donghyun out the school doors. 

"Y'know it's kinda weird after what I went through I'm still somewhat happy." Hyunwoo stated at lunch just out of thought.

"That's because you're faking it." Youngjin replied almost too casually and the table went silent.

"Yeah." Hyunwoo's voice lowered and you could see sadness spread across his face. It was true. In the hallways he ignored how people snickered as he passed. He ignored the slur he was constantly called but never directly to his face. They would laugh about him in the hallways like he was the only thing to gossip about. They felt sorry for Sungmin because a phag liked him. Hyunwoo couldn't just ignore it so he faked it. He smiled while he was crying. Laughed while he contemplated jumping off the roof at his school. He talked when he wanted to just stop everything. And he felt fake so it was true, but… it still hurt.

"Hyunwoo you seem really sad in that school. So me and your father thought it would be a good idea for you to transfer," Transfer? What transfer? He didn't want to move again. It was cozy in his school with his friends.

"This school has already offered us a very good deal and they are really good in sports like soccer. We know you all lost last year so-" Hyunwoo stood up from the dinner table and pushed his chair in hard. Transfer, he didn't want to transfer. Hyunwoo dashed out of the room, not wanting to hear another word about transferring.

"Hyunwoo!" His father called after him but Hyunwoo continued running up the stairs and slammed the door behind him as he jumped on his bed. He cried and nobody came up to his room that night.

"I can't believe you're transferring Hyun. Make sure to visit though and text back." Hyunwoo nodded at the exit gates of the school. He was surrounded by all of his friends who cried all around him. He was the only one not crying which he wanted to do so badly.

"I will." Hyunwoo sniffed. He didn't want to cry and held back his tears from coming. Minkyu, Jun, and Youngjin tackled him in a soft sincere hug, he let himself melt into their touch.

"Call me Hyunwoo." Donghyun sniffed, he stood off to the side and watched them hug with tears coming from his eyes. Hyunwoo nodded and let go of them. His parents drove him home for the first time since he was in that school. He cried on the way home and wondered what his new school would be like.

"Welcome your new student class, he will be joining us for the end of 8th grade." The teacher smiled at Hyunwoo who took a seat next to his helper for the day.

Hyunwoo heard whispers around him like, "He's cute." He heart froze when he heard one boy whisper, "Is that the phag from the other school." Hyunwoo turned around quickly searching for the person who said that.

"Quiet down please go to page 30 of your textbooks."

It had been a month at his new school and Hyunwoo had no friends but bullies. He played soccer still and found himself commonly taking out his anger on the ball set in front of him. It made him the top player in California, but it made him no happier. He played Overwatch with Minkyu and his friends almost everyday after school. He found it soothing to talk to his friends about his day although he never brought up his bullies. 

"You know that Sungmin and Sarah are dating right." Youngjin said abruptly in their game.

"Good for him." Hyunwoo felt sourness from his words. Hyunwoo sat between Minkyu's legs as they played together. 

"He told me to tell you that he missed you." Youngjin said again. Hyunwoo gulped back his tears and nodded. He was a loser, and the bruises on his body showed that.

"Youngjin stop, too soon." Jun interrupted him and shot him in the game.

"It's ok." Hyunwoo whispered softly. It wasn't ok. 

"You're Hyunphag, right?" Hyunwoo looked up at a boy sizeably bigger than him which happened a lot since it was a sports school, but he was 5'8" at 14. The boy stepped closer to him and Hyunwoo backed up. He wondered why this still happened to him even long after school as in this predicament.

"H-hello, and you are?" Hyunwoo asked, feeling anxious. He always wondered why this happened. He was only trying to live. 

"Since you like dick so much, why don't you suck mine?" Wasn't this kid 14? Hyunwoo eyes grew bigger. Was he supposed to like that? The truth was Hyunwoo didn't look into the sex part of it and only liked Sungmin for his personality. Maybe it was dumb to do that, looking back the 'am I gay quiz' wasn't a reliable source.

"No, I'm ok." Hyunwoo smiled weakly trying to get past the boy. He wasn't too muscular but he played football which Hyunwoo knew because he saw him on the field. He was 6'0" though which added a scary factor to him. The boy's hand flew to his chest stopping him. Hyunwoo glanced up and eyed the mischievous grin plastered on the boy, s face.

"Excuse me-" Hyunwoo tried to push past only getting pushed against the wall.

"You're not going anywhere until my dick is in your mouth." The boy's blue eyes flickered and Hyunwoo gulped. Why did he even want this?

"Why? I didn't do anything to you. Please leave me alone." Hyunwoo sighed, pushing at the boy's chest which stood firm. The boy only smiled as his hands pushed down firmly on Hyunwoo's shoulders. Hyunwoo did his best to fight back, but was already on his knees. He couldn't cry because needed to get out then he could cry.

"Stop! Stop! No!" Hyunwoo yelled. Hyunwoo dug his nails into the boys arms and he let out a loud shriek. The boy released his grasp from Hyunwoo and Hyunwoo sprinted away with tears in his eyes. 

"Aren't you Hyunwoo?" A boy from his new school approached him in between his classes.

"What?" Hyunwoo asked, trying to get around the boy.

"D-do you want to b-be my boyfriend?" Hyunwoo looked at the boy with a confused look.

"No, thank you." Hyunwoo tried to get around the boy to go to his next class but the boy stopped him immediately.

"I'm not gay, I just want to see…" Hyunwoo rolled his eyes and pushed past the guy. Who in their right mind would say that?

Graduation, Hyunwoo wasn't particularly happy for this part but it happened. He let himself smile as he walked across the stage but nothing after that. 

"Can I talk to you?" Hyunwoo was drinking, punch after the service and waiting for his parents to stop talking forever. It was the boy from before that asked him out, Hyunwoo wanted nothing to do with this boy.

"No." Hyunwoo started to walk away when the boy grabbed his arm with a firm grip. He dragged Hyunwoo behind him through the double doors and out onto the sidewalk. Hyunwoo ripped his arm away from the boy angrily. 

"What do you want?" Hyunwoo asked. The boy grabbed the back of his neck and smashed their lips together. Hyunwoo pushed against the boy, pulling the two apart.

"What the fuck?! Why did you do that?" Hyunwoo was furious. His first kiss, when he wanted it to be with Sungmin. 

"I'm sorry, I just like you." Hyunwoo thought for a second. He would have someone and he wouldn't be alone anymore. He wouldn't have to think about Sungmin. Should he go out with this guy?

"I-I." Hyunwoo tripped over his words feeling his confusion surfacing. 

"Hyunwoo is that you?" Hyunwoo turned his head towards the voice. It was a familiar voice he had heard before. 

"Sungmin?" Hyunwoo replied, his voice cracking a bit.

"Who the fuck is this? Is this why you won't kiss me?" The boy gripped Hyunwoo's shirt angrily.

"I don't even know you!" Hyunwoo felt himself getting angry for reasons he couldn't understand.

"Whatever!" The boy pushed Hyunwoo, making him stumble backwards. Sungmin caught his fall pushing him back up to his feet. The boy was already stomping back into the gym.

"T-thank you." Hyunwoo whispered. 

"You're so cute Hyunie. Are you ok?" 

"U-uh. I h-have to g-go." Hyunwoo stammered. He didn't want to be here at all. Why was Sungmin even here?

"Well actually I will be going with you. Your parents invited me to hangout with you after your graduation." Hyunwoo felt his anger finally surface along with his tears that showed on his face now. Hyunwoo turned around quickly, running away from the school, running away from Sungmin running away from all of it.

"Hyunwoo wait!" Hyunwoo hesitated clenching his fist tightly. He shook his head and continued running. He couldn't face Sungmin, not right now.

Summer went by quickly and Hyunwoo won several championships with his new team. He didn't feel happy when he won them just empty. Hyunwoo didn't really go out of the house unless it was a soccer game. His friends were confused why he was so emotionless and Hyunwoo didn't want to talk about it. His freshman year started in the neighborhood school, a school he knew everyone from his school and his old one were forced to attend. He walked through the doors without a smile on his face and a new haircut that was parted down the center and an undercut that made his longer hair stand out. Hyunwoo met where his friends told him too and they caught up like old times and school started.

"Hey Hyunwoo." Hyunwoo looked around to see where the voice came from. A small hand landed on his shoulder and Hyunwoo quickly turned around.

"Hi Sungmin." Hyunwoo whispered shyly. He scratched the back of his head. He felt bad about running away last time and he didn't want Sungmin to think badly about him.

"Don't run away this time." Hyunwoo chuckled and looked at the older.

"I'm sorry." Hyunwoo squeaked. He didn't know what to say and he felt awkward talking to Sungmin now.

"Do you want to catch up, maybe after school?" 

"Sungmin, can you um please not try to do this. I don't want to get hurt again. Just reject me plainly." Hyunwoo's voice got lower as he spoke and he didn't want to make Sungmin sad but he couldn't let himself get angry.

"What do you mean Hyunie? Reject you how? You like me?" Sungmin asked. Hyunwoo saw a pink tint on Sungmin's cheeks and it made him wonder if Sungmin really knew.

"W-what? Didn't they…" Hyunwoo looked around for a second.

"Didn't they, what? Oh and I'm sorry for saying I didn't want to talk to you last year. I was going through a weird phase." Sungmin smiled.

"Why did you tell Woo-sik I liked you?" Hyunwoo asked. He was feeling more confused than ever.

"What? I didn't say anything about you, except for saying I didn't want to talk to you." Sungmin shrugged his shoulders weirdly. Hyunwoo stared at him more confused than ever.

"When Minkyu, Jun, Youngjin told you that, you said you didn't care."

"Yeah, I don't care that you liked Woo-shik. I kind of figured because when we went to six flags you wanted to be near him a lot." Hyunwoo cocked his head to the side. The bell rang and both didn't move.

"I didn't like Woo-shik." Hyunwoo gritted his teeth. 

"Oh, do you want to catch up after school then?" Hyunwoo nodded and turned around. He didn't know what to believe.

"Hey guys!" Hyunwoo hugged Minkyu tightly. Youngjin and Jun side eyed them, rolling their eyes a bit, as they were the most affectionate towards each other. 

"You missed us that much. It's lunch you saw us in the morning." Hyunwoo rolled his eyes.

"I'm in honors classes and I don't have any friends in them, yes I'm lonely." (Well Sungmin was in two of his classes.) Youngjin rolled his eyes at him.

"Hey, Hyunwoo, want to hang out with me after school tomorrow?" Minkyu asked, letting go of him in their tight hug.

"Sure." Hyunwoo replied smiling at Minkyu boldly.

"Hey we are right here!" Jun complained. Hyunwoo chuckled and scooped some mashed potatoes into his mouth.

"Can I tell you something Sungmin?" He met up with Sungmin after school and they were walking down the street towards Hyunwoo's house.

"Shoot." Sungmin smiled at the younger.

"I liked you in middle school. I didn't like Woo-shik. I don't know what happened and why they told you it was Woo-shik, but I liked you." Hyunwoo let go and exhaled a bit after letting that off his chest.

"Do you still like me Hyunie?" Sungmin whispered leaning on Hyunwoo's shoulder as he pushed his key in and twisted it. Hyunwoo stayed silent how should he even answer that question. They took off their shoes and put on their house shoes. They walked up the stairs in silence and sat on Hyunwoo's bed.

"Do you still like me Hyunie?" Sungmin asked again, laying on his back.

"Yeah." Hyunwoo whispered looking at Sungmin. Sungmin sat up and looked at Hyunwoo closely. His mind raced on why Sungmin would ask that. He still wanted something, he didn't know what it was so, he took a chance. Hyunwoo leaned in pressing their lips together. Immediate guilt ran throughout his body. He didn't mean to do that. Hyunwoo leaned back feeling guilty.

"I'm sorry." Words that Hyunwoo felt he was saying way too often now. Hyunwoo looked at Sungmin's closed eyes which quickly opened when Hyunwoo pulled away.

"Do you want me to go?" Sungmin asked. Hyunwoo was confused and it showed. He shook his head no and blushed as Sungmin stared at him. Sungmin leaned forward kissing Hyunwoo. He didn't know why Sungmin would kiss him but he enjoyed it. He wanted to let the explanations come later. Hyunwoo cupped Sungmin's chin and tried his best to kiss back. The truth was he wasn't a great kisser at all. Sungmin laid back letting Hyunwoo lay on top of him.

Hyunwoo kissed him more deeply and he couldn't believe that this was happening. Sungmin looped his arms around Hyunwoo's neck bringing him closer. Hyunwoo was learning as he kissed more and his kisses got better as time went on. Hyunwoo got lost in Sungmin's lips as they intoxicated him.

"Hyunwoo, do you want to?" Sungmin whispered roughly in Hyunwoo's ear. Was he too young for that? He was only 14. He shouldn't, right?

"Ok." Hyunwoo took off his shirt and went back in on Sungmin's lips. Hyunwoo fumbled with his belt as he pulled his pants off he felt himself getting more nervous with each passing second.

"We don't have to Hyunwoo." Hyunwoo quickly shook his head no and finally pulled off his pants.

"Hyunwoo are you sure?" Sungmin asked as Hyunwoo got back on top of him. He kissed Sungmin neck aggressively and wondered if this was the way to do it, but it didn't feel right to do. He removed his lips from Sungmin and stared at him sensuously.

"What do you wanna do instead?" Hyunwoo was nervous, never having done any of what Sungmin was talking about.

"I could suck your dick?" Sungmin smirked which brought a pink tint to Hyunwoo's cheeks.

"Uh o-ok." Hyunwoo stuttered stupidly and rolled off of Sungmin. Sungmin shuffled down to his underwear pulling it down to see Hyunwoo's dick. Cold fingers suddenly wrapped around his base and he shook in shock. It was embarrassing but Hyunwoo tried to relax peeking to see if Sungmin had done anything yet. Hyunwoo moaned softly as Sungmin's lips touched his sensitive dick. 

"Hyunwoo! We're home! We got cake for your first week of school!" Hyunwoo panicked, scooting away from Sungmin to get out of bed. Hyunwoo stood up quickly and glanced at the door. Why right now?

"Hyunwoo wait, you can't go down there with a boner. Let me." Sungmin said getting on his knees in front of Hyunwoo.

"Um, sure." Hyunwoo whispered, his cheeks burning. Sungmin quickly bobbed his head on Hyunwoo, stimulating him more as he teased his tip. Hyunwoo let out a low groan and his hand travelled to Sungmin's hair.

"Hyunwoo!" His mom yelled. He knew she was downstairs. He had to say something before he got caught doing, well whatever he was doing.

"I'll be down in ten!" Hyunwoo yelled. He looked back down at Sungmin who looked right back at him. It made him drool and he couldn't even believe what was going on. Sungmin kept his eyes on him as he took all of Hyunwoo. Hyunwoo moaned and clenched his fingers around Sungmin's hair. 

"S-sungmin." He felt his climax coming, not able to hold it back anymore.

"I'm g-gonna cum." Hyunwoo tried to whisper and suppress his moans. He was surprised because of the short amount of a time he lasted, it was his first time. Hyunwoo closed his eyes and moaned louder than before but not loud enough for them to hear. Hyunwoo cummed down Sungmin's throat who surprisingly swallowed his cum. Sungmin took his lips off of Hyunwoo and stood up quickly. Hyunwoo eyed his boner then back at him.

"Do you need-"

"Get dressed, don't worry about me either Hyunie." Hyunwoo nodded and watched Sungmin grab his clothes. 

"Are you still hanging out with Minkyu this afternoon? I wanted to play Overwatch you know." Jun complained hanging on his side.

"I got a question and you can't be angry with me Jun." Hyunwoo completely ignored Jun's question but it bothered neither of them.

"Go ahead."

"Remember last year." Jun sighed. Hyunwoo knew he was tired of talking about it because he couldn't do anything about Hyunwoo being unhappy.

"I want to forget it." Jun said sarcastically. They were walking to lunch together, Jun having his class right next to Hyunwoo's. 

"Um, when you guys told Sungmin I liked him, what did you guys say to him?" Hyunwoo was nervous for the response had they lied to him?

"We told him that you couldn't tell him something really important because you were scared and that you liked him." Jun was quick to respond. Hyunwoo nodded thinking back to what Sungmin said about Woo-shik. They opened the double doors to lunch, Hyunwoo looked around for a bit before spotting Sungmin and Woo-shik like old times. He smiled as Sungmin laughed, his eyes disappearing into crescents. Sungmin glanced at Hyunwoo across from the lunch room with his smile still shining. Hyunwoo quickly looked away and back at Jun. They continued walking to their daily table. 

"Where do you want to go first?" Minkyu asked, interlocking their arms as they walked down the street.

"Um, my house, we have cake." Hyunwoo raised his eyebrows in excitement. Minkyu giggled and looked around their suburb.

"Let's go get food first then." Hyunwoo nodded. They reached the pizza place and Hyunwoo played on his phone while Minkyu ordered for them. 

"Hyunwoo?" Hyunwoo looked up from his phone to see the infamous Sungmin. Was he following him or something? 

"Hi." Hyunwoo replied nervously. Hyunwoo felt uncomfortable around Sungmin now and he had valid reasoning for feeling that way.

"Are you doing something? Want to hang out?" Hyunwoo knew he was flirting by the way he smiled and eyed his pants. Hyunwoo felt his cheeks go red. 

"I-I'm here with Minkyu. So, I guess we can talk later." Hyunwoo wanted to look over at Minkyu and see if he noticed them talking. He knew it would tick Minkyu off to see Hyunwoo talking to a person who treated him so poorly.

"Let's talk later then." Hyunwoo watched Sungmin walk away and glanced back at the line to see Minkyu ordering their pizza. He smiled as he loved Minkyu's charisma. It was so original to him to be so nice to others unless they were bad people of course. Hyunwoo liked that about Minkyu among other things that made him love Minkyu.

"Hyunwoo?" Hyunwoo laid on Minkyu's chest comfortably, wrapping his arms across Minkyu's chest. They were watching Iron man, something Hyunwoo watched more than enough times to know the characters lines. It didn't ruin the fun as he loved the story more each time. 

"Min?" Hyunwoo giggled, moving his head to look at Minkyu.

"Would you think it's too early to date after what happened with you and Sungmin?" Hyunwoo nuzzled his face back into Minkyu's chest. Was it too early to date Sungmin and do stuff like that? Did Sungmin even like him?

"Maybe but I'm always open to dating. I just, it was hard you know going through something like that. I don't know Min." Hyunwoo heard Minkyu's heartbeat against his ear and it soothed him to have Minkyu so close to him. Hyunwoo placed his hand on Minkyu's peck wanting to feel his heartbeat too. Hyunwoo smiled as Minkyu's heartbeat quickened beneath his fingers.

"Yeah, I get that." Minkyu responded after a long pause of silence. Hyunwoo turned his head to look at Min again. A smile formed in his lips as Minkyu looked back at him. Minkyu's hand gripped Hyunwoo's chin as his thumb softly pressed against his cheek.

"You're so cute Hyunie." Minkyu whispered, kissing Hyunwoo's forehead. Hyunwoo blushed as Minkyu kissed all over his face.

"Stop it." Hyunwoo giggled trying to swat away Minkyu's hands, to stop Minkyu from kissing him. Hyunwoo crawled on top of Minkyu and wrapped his arms around his neck. Hyunwoo nuzzled his face into Minkyu's neck. Minkyu's hands played in his hair and he felt warm with Minkyu.

Hyunwoo woke up on top of Minkyu in almost the same position as when he closed his eyes. He knew his parents tucked them in, and probably cooed at the two. Hyunwoo untangled himself from Minkyu. He smiled as drool hung out of Minkyu's mouth. He placed his hand on Minkyu's stomach, shaking him gently.

"Wake up." Hyunwoo whispered softly into Minkyu's ear.

The first trimester ended a few weeks later. Hyunwoo didn't talk to Sungmin much as always and he and Minkyu were getting closer than best friends each passing day. They hung out alone more often but still spent time with their other best friends. Hyunwoo didn't know why Sungmin hadn't talked to him much throughout those weeks. Hyunwoo sat on Minkyu's lap outside waiting for the other two best friends to come outside. Hyunwoo had said he was tired which was an excuse to wrap his arms around Minkyu's neck and rest his head on his shoulder. Hyunwoo giggled as Minkyu snored in his ear. It had been twenty minutes and there was still no sign of them.

"Minkyu we should go see if they're ok." Hyunwoo whispered looking at Minkyu's closed eyes.

"Ok." Minkyu whispered, opening his eyes. Hyunwoo scooted off of Minkyu's lap and they walked into the school with Minkyu hanging sleepily on Hyunwoo's shoulder.

"Hey." Sungmin smiled at Hyunwoo as he walked by. Hyunwoo quickly stood in front of Sungmin to talk to him.

"Hey, Sungmin. Do you w-want to hang out later?" Hyunwoo felt Minkyu picking his head off of his shoulder. Minkyu looked at him with parted lips as he talked to Sungmin like he did before. Before what happened to him took place.

"Sure, how about tomorrow." Hyunwoo nodded and Sungmin passed by leaving out the school doors.

'When did you start talking to him again?" Hyunwoo looked at Minkyu and remembered it was supposed to be a secret and he was fucked. Maybe Minkyu would understand.

"Look, I just thought we could be friends again." Hyunwoo explained trying not to make Minkyu mad.

"You know I just don't want you to get hurt again Hyunie." Hyunwoo nodded feeling guilty. Was Sungmin going to hurt him again?

"I know I know, I won't let that happen to me again." 

"Whatever Hyunie." Minkyu sighed, wrapping his arm around Hyunwoo's shoulders, bringing him close.

"What have you been up to since I transferred Sungmin?" Hyunwoo asked. They sat on Hyunwoo's bed facing each other.

"Nothing really, Woo-shik and me just spent our summer together and we lost the first round of playoffs again."

"Do you like Woo-shik?" Hyunwoo asked. Hyunwoo knew he would have to ask this question at least once.

"No, we are just friends. I like you though." Hyunwoo felt a weird feeling in his stomach and glanced at Sungmin.

"That's hard to believe coming from you." Hyunwoo didn't want to get sucked to Sungmin's lies again. Hyunwoo had walls that he thought to be unbreakable.

"I can prove I like you." Hyunwoo's cheeks reddened. He hated how Sungmin made him feel like this. Sungmin came closer to Hyunwoo's face, kissing him softly on the lips. 

"You like me too right Hyunie?" Hyunwoo nodded, kissing Sungmin back. 

"Can you prove it?" Sungmin asked, smiling against Hyunwoo's lips. Hyunwoo nodded again. Sungmin pushed Hyunwoo on the bed pulling off his shirt. Hyunwoo gripped Sungmin's waist as he straddled him.

"Have sex with me." Sungmin whispered. Sungmin kissing Hyunwoo's neck aggressively as he gripped Hyunwoo's shirt in his fists.

"I d-don't know." Hyunwoo spoke cautiously. He was too young if he had to be honest with himself.

"Come on, I won't bite." Sungmin whispered and licked Hyunwoo's neck.

"I don't want to rush into it. I'm only 15 Sungmin." Sungmin stopped and pulled away.

"I'm 15 too." Hyunwoo gulped at Sungmin's words. Maybe he should.

"Ok." Hyunwoo whispered unsure of himself. Sungmin took off Hyunwoo's shirt and sucked Hyunwoo's nipples. Hyunwoo moaned, running his fingers through Sungmin's hair. Sungmin reached down wrapping his hand around Hyunwoo's dick. Sungmin's thumb ran over Hyunwoo's tip which Hyunwoo let a moan slip past his lips. Sungmin slowly kissed down Hyunwoo's body, slowly jerking him off. They both froze when someone knocked on Hyunwoo's door. Sungmin did the best he could to try and get off of Hyunwoo as soon as possible but the door opened when he barely took his hand out of Hyunwoo's pants.

"Hyunwoo you need to-. You two are far too young to be doing this! Get up both of you!" His father yelled, his face quickly turned red from anger.

"I'm sorry Dad." Hyunwoo squirmed away from Sungmin and quickly stood up, Sungmin doing the same. Hyunwoo blushed in embarrassment and wished he hadn't agreed to have sex.

"Please leave Sungmin." Sungmin grabbed his shirt as quick as he could and ran past Hyunwoo's Dad out the door.

"Dad, why did you kick him out-"

"I ask the questions here young man. You hear me! Now come downstairs when you're done getting dressed." Hyunwoo nodded and his Father slammed the door behind him. Hyunwoo put his head in his hands as tears came from his eyes.

The second trimester went by painfully slow. His parents scolded him for wanting to have sex so early but supported his accidental coming out the closet. Sungmin didn't talk to him much again after that and Hyunwoo knew it was because he was embarrassed. Everytime he glanced at Hyunwoo his cheeks blazed red. Hyunwoo and Minkyu were basically a couple who didn't kiss. The only ones that didn't see them together were Hyunwoo and Minkyu. 

"Hyunwoo, do you want to hang out at my place?" Sungmin asked shyly between classes.

"No funny business this time Sungmin. Can we just talk as friends this time? My parents got really mad." Hyunwoo chuckled a bit. 

"I don't just want to be your friend Hyunwoo." Sungmin whispered in Hyunwoo's ear. Hyunwoo's cheeks blazed red with Sungmin so close.

"W-well. Alright I'll come over. Only third base though Sungmin." Hyunwoo stammered a bit at the start but he was happy he kept his sentences together. 

"Can we go somewhere right now." Sungmin whispered, getting closer to Hyunwoo's ear. Hyunwoo only nodded and was immediately dragged into an empty hallway.

Sungmin pressed him against the wall kissing Hyunwoo desperately. Hyunwoo moaned into Sungmin's mouth and turned him around pinning Sungmin against the wall. Their lips locked again and Hyunwoo caressed his face bringing him closer. The bell rang loudly and Hyunwoo pulled away from Sungmin.

"B-bye Sungmin." Hyunwoo whispered, starting to leave.

"Be my boyfriend Hyunie." Sungmin said chasing after Hyunwoo.

"U-uh, I don't want to get hurt again I'm sorry." Hyunwoo rambled. Of course he wanted to be with Sungmin. But there was something telling him no.

"You know Hyunie, I can't wait forever for you to trust me again. I said I was sorry for ignoring you last year." Sungmin whispered seductively bringing his face closer to Hyunwoo's 

"You did more than ignore me Sungmin. You know you're confusing me." Sungmin stretched his neck up to kiss Hyunwoo and pecked him softly.

"What's confusing about that?" Sungmin smiled leaning on Hyunwoo's shoulder.

"A lot, Sungmin." Hyunwoo chuckled. The second rang and they said their goodbyes which Sungmin did by stealing a kiss from Hyunwoo.

"Sungmin, slow down." Hyunwoo chuckled as Sungmin kissed his body quickly. Sungmin smiled taking hold of Hyunwoo's cock. 

"I really want this inside of me, Hyunie." Sungmin smirked, licking the side of it.

"Woah, I said no funny business mister." Hyunwoo giggled. Maybe it was just him but they were joking like the old times and it felt good. Hyunwoo's phone rang loudly on the table. He glanced at his phone then back at Sungmin who didn't look too happy.

"Can I-" Sungmin rolled his eyes and got off of Hyunwoo. Hyunwoo watched him go to his bathroom slamming the door behind him and sighed. He picked up the only quickly and held it to his ear.

"Hyunwoo, where are you?" Jun's voice could be heard over the phone.

"Hi mom. What do you want?" Hyunwoo said sarcastically. 

"We are going shopping for Youngjin's birthday present, want to come? His birthday is in a week you know." Hyunwoo sighed and looked at the bathroom door.

"Where are you guys?" Hyunwoo asked, playing with Sungmin's expensive bed sheets.

"In your house, where are you?"

"None of your business. I'll be there in 20 wait for me!" Hyunwoo joked, doing an impression of Youngjin with his last sentence. They chuckled and hung up after a little bit more chatting. Hyunwoo sighed and opened the bathroom door.

"You couldn't say no?" Sungmin tapped his foot on the ground.

"You can come with. We're going shopping for Youngjin's birthday present and I couldn't miss that." Hyunwoo whispered, stepping closer towards Sungmin.

"Why do you do this? You keep pushing me away." Hyunwoo sighed and reached for Sungmin's hands, his efforts swatted away quickly.

"I'm sorry, for pushing you away Sungmin. Trust me I like you. This is just really important." Sungmin rolled his eyes. 

"So I'm not important?" Hyunwoo fucked up.

"No, I-I. Min-Sungmin, I-I mean M-Sungmin. Fuck, I meant Sungmin, you're important to me. I'm sorry. Do you want me to stay?" Hyunwoo fucked up big time.

"Min? I'm not fucking Minkyu. Do I even look like Minkyu?! Why did you call me fucking Minkyu?!" 

"Minkyu's my best friend Sungmin. I just scrambled my words you know-"

"Get the fuck out! I can't talk to you right now." Hyunwoo panicked. He had no idea why he called Sungmin, Minkyu. Sungmin turned his back to Hyunwoo angrily.

"Sungmin, it was an accident. Please. You know I would never hurt you. I'm sorry." Hyunwoo reached out, touching Sungmin's bare back.

"Do you like Minkyu or something? Why would you even call me that?" Sungmin turned around facing Hyunwoo.

"I don't like Minkyu. I'll make it up to you Sungmin." Hyunwoo was desperate at this point.

"Right now or after you go hang out with your friends." 

"Right now, with you. I can reschedule." Hyunwoo pleaded. 

"Fine redeem yourself." Sungmin walked past Hyunwoo into the bedroom sitting on his bed.

Hyunwoo reached for his phone calling Jun back quickly.

"Where are you dumbass?" Minkyu's voice could be heard from the phone. Hyunwoo gulped. He hated lying to Minkyu.

"I can't come this time. I'll buy my present for him another time."

"Aw man. Ok, I'm going with you though." 

"Ok, see you guys later." Hyunwoo hung up and looked at Sungmin.

"So, how will you redeem yourself?" 

"Want to watch a movie, go out somewhere maybe?" Hyunwoo suggested sitting down on the bed.

"I think you could do something else for me Hyunwoo." Sungmin whispered.

"Do you want me to suck your dick? I may not be good. I haven't done that sort of thing before." Hyunwoo didn't like saying bad words so that felt kind of awkward for him to say.

"No, I want you to do something to me." Hyunwoo raised his eyebrows in confusion.

"You want me to pleasure you right?" Hyunwoo smiled in confusion.

"In the best way." Sungmin smirked, pulling off his underwear.

"So what do you need?" Hyunwoo asked as Sungmin laid back on the bed. 

"I need you…" Hyunwoo crawled over to Sungmin laying on top of him with their faces inches apart.

"You need me?" Hyunwoo asked, kissing Sungmin's neck softly.

"Inside of me." Sungmin whispered.

"You know I can't do that Sungmin." Hyunwoo complained and looked down at Sungmin.

"Please." Sungmin pleaded.

"I'll put my fingers inside of you." Hyunwoo decided, trying to satisfy Sungmin.

"We can go with what you're comfortable with." Hyunwoo smiled, kissing Sungmin's neck again. He humped against Sungmin's leg as he sucked hickeys on Sungmin's neck. Hyunwoo slid his finger into his mouth and watched patiently as Sungmin sucked his fingers. Hyunwoo teased around to rim Sungmin's hole as he kissed his chest slowly making his way down Sungmin's body to his cock. Sungmin's moans were like honey and he still couldn't believe this was happening. Hyunwoo took Sungmin's dick swallowing it as he moved his head up and down on it. Hyunwoo listened to Sungmin's sweet moans as he ran his fingers through his hair. Hyunwoo pushed his finger into Sungmin. Sungmin moans echoed through the room as Hyunwoo pleasured him.

"Your tight Sungmin." Hyunwoo whispered, taking his lips off of Sungmin for a split second. Hyunwoo jerked Sungmin off to focus more on Sungmin's entrance.

"Are you ok with another finger?" Hyunwoo asked, rubbing Sungmin's stomach.

"Yeah." Sungmin struggled to talk through moans. Hyunwoo added another finger, making Sungmin cry out.

"Are you ok?" Hyunwoo asked, looking at Sungmin. His eyes were closed tightly and his legs were wide open for Hyunwoo's access.

"I want you inside me." Sungmin breathed out opening his eyes.

"If you keep begging me, I won't be able to hold back any longer." Hyunwoo whispered roughly.

"Please." Hyunwoo smiled. Beads of sweat formed beautifully on Sungmin's honey skin.

"P-please." Sungmin gripped the sheets tightly in his hands.

"Pretty please." Sungmin repeated. Hyunwoo took his fingers out of Sungmin and positioned himself in front of Sungmin's hole.

"Do you have condoms?" Hyunwoo asked, looking down into Sungmin's closed eyes.

"In my backpack, in case you wanted to finally budge." Hyunwoo smirked and rummaged inside of Sungmin's backpack for condoms. Hyunwoo rolled on condom like they were taught in sex ed and got back in front of Sungmin.

"Are you sure Sungmin?" Hyunwoo asked, looking down seductively at Sungmin. No matter what he said before he always wanted this. Maybe when he was a little older though.

"Yeah." Hyunwoo slowly entered Sungmin as Sungmin gasped at the sudden entrance. 

"Are you ok?" Hyunwoo asked stopping his movements.

"I-I'm fine." Sungmin whispered. Hyunwoo nodded pushing all the way in. Sungmin winced at the pain and Hyunwoo began feeling more worried.

"Do you want to stop?" Hyunwoo asked, moving Sungmin's hair from his forehead.

"No, it's not bad." Hyunwoo nodded, moving slowly inside and out of Sungmin. Sungmin closed his eyes tightly but the pleasure gradually came as the pain went. Sungmin wrapped his arms around Hyunwoo's back, bringing him closer.

"Make it up to me." Sungmin whispered, biting Hyunwoo's ear gently. Hyunwoo went deeper into Sungmin and faster than before making the bed creak and their skin slapped together. Sungmin moaned with each thrust which was music to Hyunwoo's ears.

"Harder." Hyunwoo obeyed fucking to Sungmin at a slight angle like he saw in the porn he watched. Hyunwoo was even embarrassed to admit he watched stuff like that. Sungmin moaned louder in Hyunwoo's ear and Hyunwoo fucked harder into him. 

"Right there." Sungmin moaned and gripped Hyunwoo's back, his nails digging into him. Hyunwoo winced at the pain but kept hitting the same spot again. It felt right with Sungmin. It didn't matter what age they were in the moment. It only mattered if both of them felt right in the moment. Hyunwoo felt good being this close to Sungmin, being inside of Sungmin. Hyunwoo cummed and moaned loudly into Sungmin's ear. Hyunwoo still thrusted quickly and hard into Sungmin wanting to pleasure him. Sungmin cried out in his ear and Hyunwoo smiled as Sungmin cummed on their stomachs.

"We're finally going shopping, you big baby." Minkyu walked next to him as they walked throughout the strip mall. It was day after he had sex with Sungmin. It was the weekend still and school was the next day so he decided to shop with Minkyu of course.

"I'm not a baby Min." Hyunwoo smiled as Minkyu was the one leaning on his shoulder, hypocrisy at its finest.

"You're my baby." Hyunwoo became flustered and smiled at the older. He was Minkyu's baby. 

"You don't get to call me that Minkyu." Hyunwoo crossed his arms, fake pouting. 

"Let's go there baby." Minkyu smirked, pointing at a music store. Youngjin was getting more into rap and recording mix-tapes so it would be smart to get him some equipment.

"Yeah let's go there, honey." Hyunwoo teased back with his own nickname for Minkyu.

"Ok sugar." Minkyu laughed coming back with yet another nickname.

"Yeah let's go sweety." Hyunwoo glanced at Minkyu who looked shocked at his nickname.

"Let's stick to baby. No pun intended." Minkyu giggled, pushing Hyunwoo softly.

"I don't know why you bought so many presents for him but he is going to be ecstatic." Minkyu jumped onto Hyunwoo's bed. It had been a long day of shopping and Youngjin's birthday was in two days. They made it so they didn't have to wrap presents giving them extra work.

"I hope so." Hyunwoo said cuddling on top of Minkyu.

"You always hug me Hyunwoo." Minkyu sighed, rubbing Hyunwoo's back. 

"Hmm, your warm baby." Hyunwoo whispered, closing his eyes for a second. 

"We're still calling each other that." Minkyu giggled. 

"Yes of course," Hyunwoo paused hugging Minkyu a little tighter, "Are you sleeping over a babe?" Hyunwoo got off Minkyu to look for some pajamas for the two. 

"Sure." Minkyu sat up and looked at Hyunwoo. Hyunwoo took his shirt off and looked at Minkyu.

"Do you want to take a shower first?"

"Uh, y-yeah." Minkyu got up quickly. Hyunwoo chuckled as he ran to the bathroom.

Hyunwoo hugged Minkyu tight. They were both shirtless because Hyunwoo had checked his pajama drawer three times and found nothing but pajama pants. So now Hyunwoo's face was buried into Minkyu's bare chest. He was okay with it though, it just made Minkyu even warmer.

"Hyunwoo?" Minkyu whispered. Hyunwoo scooted up to look Minkyu in the eye.

"Yeah baby." Hyunwoo asked. He smiled at Minkyu, he always looked so cute. Minkyu's hand caressed Hyunwoo's cheek. Hyunwoo looked at his hand then back at Minkyu. 

"You're very beautiful." Hyunwoo smiled brightly like he always had around Minkyu,  
"Can I kiss you?" Kiss him? He had Sungmin. Hyunwoo blocked those thoughts out of his head about Sungmin. It was more like those thoughts had drifted away because he always wanted to see how Minkyu's lips tasted. 

"Yeah." Hyunwoo whispered, his voice sounding more soft and sleepy than before. Minkyu curiously looked up into Hyunwoo's eyes then back at his lips. Minkyu leaned forward, his lips touching Hyunwoo's. Minkyu's lips were soft and caring unlike Sungmin's who moved fast. Hyunwoo wrapped his hand in Minkyu's hair not to bring them closer but to touch Minkyu as they kissed. Hyunwoo had wished this was his kiss instead of a sloppy kiss at the end of graduation. This kiss was gently crafted and meant for more than sex could ever offer. Hyunwoo's lips delicately glided over Minkyu's. It was sweet and Hyunwoo loved it. Minkyu pulled back and smiled at Hyunwoo. They smiled until they went in for another kiss, and then another, intoxicated by each other's sweet lips. 

"Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. Happy birthday dear Youngie, happy birthday to you." Minkyu went for the high note with Jun, their voices cracking several times through it. Youngjin blew out the candles and glanced at the both of them who were still singing.

"Thank you, thank you." Youngjin cut them off and they both noticed they were screaming at the top of their lungs and giggled.

"How does it feel turning 16 so early." Minkyu asked. Jun and Hyunwoo giggled mischievously.

"Shut up." Youngjin laughed staring back at his cake.

"No you shut up old man." Hyunwoo giggled and all of them burst into laughter, all except for Youngjin just smiled at his friends.

Youngjin loved his new equipment and presents from his friends but now it was May. School was almost over. Hyunwoo avoided Sungmin after they had sex. He didn't know what to say and he knew it was wrong to do so. Both he and Minkyu didn't address their kiss and it didn't feel good to do that either. They just went on as being friends when both wanted much more.

"I need to talk to you." Sungmin approached him at his lunch table. Hyunwoo gulped to hear his friend's reactions.

"Can't you see we're busy." Youngjin snapped back. Hyunwoo glanced at Youngjin, why was he so angry?

"I can talk. Let's go to the bathroom." Minkyu glared at him as he stood up.

"Hyunwoo, you shouldn't." Jun butted in.

"It's fine. It's only for a second." Minkyu didn't say anything and just ate which concerned him but he left anyway.

"Are you scared to talk to me or something? And you didn't even tell your friends we were talking again?" Sungmin asked and Hyunwoo could see the pure rage in his eyes.

"I just didn't know what to say. I know I should have talked to you, what I did was wrong." Hyunwoo whispered, grabbing Sungmin's biceps and running his thumb along his muscles.

"You should have talked to me. You can't just fuck me and then ignore me the next day." Hyunwoo felt more guilty now. He shouldn't have done that.

"I know, and I'm sorry. Do you want me to come over again?" Hyunwoo whispered, bringing Sungmin closer. Sungmin nodded, making Hyunwoo smile at his cuteness. Hyunwoo leaned forward, pecking him on the lips softly.

"See you later, Don't ever do that shit again." Sungmin walked away going up the stairs. Hyunwoo sighed and went back into the lunch room sitting at his table. It was completely silent when he sat down.

"Where's Minkyu?" Hyunwoo asked, looking around.

"Are you with Sungmin?" Youngjin asked cleaning his nails.

"No." Hyunwoo looked at the both of them suspiciously. They were acting weird like they were angry.

"Then why did Woo-sik just tell us that you guys had sex?" Jun asked. They both looked upset. Huh? Woo-shik? Hyunwoo stood up abruptly and they glared at him. 

"Where are you even going?" Youngjin asked. Hyunwoo didn't respond. Woo-shik had such a fucking pottey mouth in 8th grade and then now. Hyunwoo stomped over to Woo-shik's table and Youngjin got up following him, almost like he knew what was about to happen. 

"What do you want, lover boy?" Woo-sik asked, glancing up at Hyunwoo blatantly. Hyunwoo grabbed his collar, punching him straight in the jaw. The whole lunch gasped in fear and excitement.

"In eighth grade and then now? What do you want from me?!" Hyunwoo yelled, tackling Woo-sik to the ground. Hyunwoo punched him again as Woo-sik tried to get away from Hyunwoo. Woo-sik punched back, and it just fueled him more. Hyunwoo punched him in the nose, cracking it under his knuckles. It all felt like it happened in slow motion. Why was he even doing this? He didn't hate even Woo-sik. He hated himself, how could he do that to Minkyu and Sungmin.

"Stop!" Youngjin grabbed Hyunwoo's arm. Hyunwoo ripped his arm away and punched Woo-sik again. Jun grabbed Hyunwoo tightly, trying to pull him off of Woo-sik.

"Get off of me! That son of a bitch deserves what he's getting!" Hyunwoo yelled and ripped himself away from Jun's arms, punching Woo-sik again.

"What is going on here?!" A teacher yelled. Hyunwoo didn't care that a teacher was here, an army could be here and he wouldn't care. In the moment he wanted to hurt Woo-sik very badly. The teacher grabbed Hyunwoo and picked him up off the ground like a teddy bear. Hyunwoo squirmed around trying to get free. He was so angry it intoxicated him. He was so angry he couldn't see. 

"Suspension! Hyunwoo what happened you never act like this! You embarrassed us to you didn't answer any of the principals questions and you don't even tell us why you punched this poor boy." Hyunwoo looked down at his lap. He was in the principal's office with his parents while Woo-sik was in the nurse's office.

"Answer her young man!" His father yelled in his ear loudly.

"I don't have to tell you anything." Hyunwoo couldn't take being in this small office anymore.

"I said answer her young man, you hear me?" Hyunwoo glanced at his father then at the principal.

"What was your question?" Hyunwoo asked so carelessly like he was letting go.

"Why did you hurt Kim Woo-shik?" The principal asked.

"Because, I didn't want him spreading rumors about me." Hyunwoo whispered honestly.

"That's no reason to hurt someone, you know that." The principal said softly. 

"What were the rumors?" His Dad asked calmer than before.

"Um." Was as Hyunwoo could say. 

"Hyunwoo please wait in the hallway." The principal was gentle with him and he didn't understand why. Hyunwoo quickly stood up and walked out the door. There were people in the waiting room and he just wanted to be alone. Hyunwoo left the principal's office and turned down the hallway. Woo-sik stood across from him with several bandages on his face. He didn't even want to talk to Woo-sik right now.

"Why did you hit me?" Woo-shik asked.

"I hurt you because in 8th grade you spread rumors about me and you did it again. I don't hate you." Hyunwoo started walking again towards the exit of the school.

"I'm sorry. I didn't think you even wanted to keep it a secret. Liking someone isn't a big deal." 

"Liking a boy is." Hyunwoo kept walking still and rounded the corner to see his friends waiting for him. He quickly turned back around but he knew that they already saw him.

"What are you doing idiot?" Youngjin asked, calling out for him.

"Running away from you what else." Hyunwoo answered, quickening his pace. Woo-sik watched him walk back into the waiting room like nothing ever happened, he laughed and his foolishness.

Hyunwoo glanced at his table then decided to sit alone. He hadn't even sat alone when he first came to the school. He had a week of suspension and his parents tricked him into going to therapy which he hated. They didn't ask anymore about what happened and only tried to help him. He hadn't talked to his friends or even Sungmin in a week due to him being grounded and he didn't want to talk to them anyway.

A tray clacked against his table and Hyunwoo looked up from his food.

"Hey Mr. Lonely." Donghyun chuckled glancing at Hyunwoo.

"Hi Donghyun." Hyunwoo answered softly and sadly. He didn't know why he was so sad he just knew he was. And something about that fight flipped a switch in him.

"I've got tea and this time I don't want to make you cry." Hyunwoo chuckled at his dark joke and scooped his probably chemically induced school ice cream into his mouth.

"Go ahead tell me." Hyunwoo braced for what he was about to get told.

"All your friends want to talk to you again. They said they don't care that you made a mistake, even Minkyu."

"They told you to say that right and Minkyu still hates me because he is giving me a dirty look right now." Hyunwoo whispered softly. Donghyun glanced at his table and Hyunwoo was right.

"You can go now, I really want to be alone. Thanks for trying to cheer me up though." Hyunwoo whispered. 

"Bye." Donghyun got up and walked back to his table. Hyunwoo sighed and put his head in his arms. He hated himself.

The school year ended like that and so did summer. Hyunwoo played soccer like always and he wanted to be alone. He never went to Sungmin's house. Sungmin did try to talk to him and kiss him which he responded with please give me time or leave me alone. Hyunwoo still was the best soccer player in California but he was still empty. It was like he hit a brick wall of depression.

"School's starting are you excited." Someone wrapped their arm around his shoulder and brought him close. He was listening to Youngjin's rap as he walked to his first class.

"Please leave me alone." Hyunwoo whispered. 

"Aw come on, how long are you going to be sad." Sungmin asked, pushing him a bit.

"Please Sungmin, go away." Sungmin sighed looking at the hunched over "new" Hyunwoo as everyone called him.

"Hyunwoo, do you need someone to talk to?" Sungmin asked, concerned.

"I already have a therapist I visit every Thursday. Can you leave me alone now Sungmin? I know you may hate me right now so please leave me alone." Sungmin sighed and walked away. His wall was stronger than before and blocked out too many people. He was pushing away more than he could count and became so bad no one approached him.

"Fucking loner." Hyunwoo looked up and saw Minkyu walking past him. 

"Minkyu! Can we talk?!" 

"Leave me alone Hyunwoo, I want nothing to do with you." Hyunwoo sighed and turned around. He wasn't going to school anymore.

"How come you don't bring anyone over anymore Hyunwoo? I'm worried about you. You don't seem happy anymore." His mom whispered, hugging him tightly. She didn't even bring up the fact that he had gotten in trouble for missing the first three weeks of school. That she had been called from her work by the principal to come pick her son up after being spotted on the street with a brown bag in his hand. Which contained Youngjin's records.

"We are going to need you to drive Hyunwoo to school to make sure he comes. We don't want him missing anymore classes, he is an excellent student." His mom nodded. Hyunwoo began to cry soaking his Mom's t-shirt. How did he get like this?

"Hyunwoo you came to school!" Sungmin exclaimed hanging on his shoulder as they transitioned classes.

"Hi Sungmin, what's up?" Sungmin raised his eyebrows in confusion.

"Are you ok?" Hyunwoo smirked.

"You were enjoying talking to a wall weren't you." Hyunwoo decided he could fake it to make his friends happier. Sungmin hugged him tightly and Hyunwoo heard him sniffle. He didn't know it was that serious.

"Thank you. Whatever you want me to be I'll be it. I'm here for you." Hyunwoo nodded. The bell rang and they went to their separate classes.

Hyunwoo thought about it for a moment as he listened to Youngjin's song on repeat. He liked Minkyu more than a friend when he messed up. Now Minkyu didn't even look at him for more than a second. And if he did, it was to judge him. He was staring at his table for a particularly long time, specifically Minkyu's back. Youngjin pointed at him and Hyunwoo became pale. Minkyu turned around and looked at him. Fuck.

"Can you move?" A girl behind him asked.

"Oh sorry." Hyunwoo bowed at her like he was in Gwanju and cursed himself. He sat down at his lonely table and cursed all his dreams to hell. He didn't have to eat lunch here. He was leaving. Hyunwoo got up abruptly and looked back at his table, they were staring at him and it was obvious. Shit. Hyunwoo took steps towards the exit which was right past their table. If he sped up he could make it. Hyunwoo speed walked right towards the doors and his gaze was focused solely on them. He didn't want to stop, look at his friends, look at Minkyu, and especially not Sungmin. Hyunwoo was almost there. He could do it. Someone grabbed his sleeve, almost making him fall at the tight grip. No! Game over. Hyunwoo didn't even look at the person. He already knew who it was.

"E-excuse me, I-I'm trying to go somewhere." Hyunwoo whispered softly. His words were probably inaudible but he didn't care.

"You look like an idiot right now. An idiot with tunnel vision." Jun sighed and Minkyu got up leaving the table.

"Sit down." Youngjin said letting Minkyu leave.

"Please excuse me." Hyunwoo said stupidly, looking down at Youngjin's hand.

"Sit down asshole." Hyunwoo sighed and sat down on the cold seat.

"Wow you made it to school! And the first thing you want to do is ignore us after a summer of not talking to us. That's a no no." Jun said with a melody on his last sentence.

"I'm sorry. I don't know what to say to you guys." Hyunwoo said, looking at his lap.

"Well sorry is a great start." Jun took a bite of his korean fried chicken. He got better at cooking with each passing day.

"I'm sorry." Hyunwoo repeated feeling stupid.

"You already said that dummy." Youngjin said.

"Oh," Hyunwoo felt bad for making Minkyu leave when it was supposed to be the four of them all together.

"Hyunwoo, stop being so stupid. And never think that your best friends hate you again. Sungmin even asked us where you were. Don't hide from us." Hyunwoo nodded. Jun hugged him along with Youngjin. They asked him what he was listening to and they all chuckled when he responded with Young J. They joked and it was finally coming back to old times. It wasn't the same without Minkyu though and Hyunwoo hated that it was like that.

"Can I talk to you?" Hyunwoo asked. Sungmin nodded.

"Do you still like me?" Hyunwoo felt stupid popping that question.

"Um, that's quick. Why?"

"I'm confused." That was obvious.

"I do, but, I bet you don't feel the same. You're going through a lot right now. Whatever you need I got it." Sungmin said it with a cute smile on his face which made him blush.

"Can I go to your house today?" Hyunwoo asked feeling kind of foolish that he wanted to have sex with Sungmin after all this time.

"Sure. Hyunwoo, when you can, please talk to Woo-shik." Hyunwoo nodded and walked past Sungmin to his last class, the only class Minkyu had honors in.

"Hyunwoo you made it today! Everyone come on give a round of applause." Hyunwoo bowed his head again stupidly because in America they didn't even do that. 

"You're sitting right next to Minkyu." Hyunwoo stared at the teacher then at his seat. 

"Is there a problem?" The teacher asked. Hyunwoo felt like his feet were glued to the ground and he couldn't breathe. He had to do this though.

"I-I'm fine. T-thank you M-mr. R-rieden." Hyun cursed at himself for shuddering so goddamn much. The class giggled and Hyunwoo gulped as he shuffled over to his seat. 

"What is the answer?" Hyunwoo raised his hand. Minkyu glared at him and he felt his gaze burn into the side of his head.

"Hyunwoo." Hyunwoo put down his hand and answered.

"T-two." Hyun hated how he stuttered so much when Minkyu looked at him. He felt weak.

"Correct, three weeks gone and you're on fire." The teacher wrote down the answer.

"Come up the board and show us how it's done." Hyunwoo felt sweat on his forehead. Why him?

"Oh! Never mind sorry, Hyunwoo." The teacher looked like he remembered something. Hyunwoo let out a breath of air and rested his head in his palm.

"Special treatment at its finest." Minkyu whispered. Hyunwoo glanced at him confused. Special treatment? These were times when Hyunwoo thought he was blind.

"May I go to the bathroom. Hyunwoo blurted out." It was like the teacher read his mind like a book. 

"Someone go with Hyunwoo." Now he couldn't leave. 

"I'll go with him." Minkyu said, grabbing Hyunwoo's arm. Fuck. Of all people, why him? 

They left the classroom and Minkyu held his arm tightly like he knew Hyunwoo was going to try to run away. Hyunwoo had to try right? He was the number one soccer player in California. Was he even fast enough? Hyunwoo tried to rip his arm away from Minkyu's hands. It was like a surprise attack kind of. Hyunwoo began to run and he felt stupid becuase Minkyu still held onto him.

"Stop running away!" Minkyu yelled, wrapping his arms around Hyunwoo's torso. Hyunwoo tried to get free but just stopped after awhile because he felt dumb. Hyunwoo just breathed hard in Minkyu arms and put his head on his shoulder. He couldn't cry because Minkyu wouldn't understand. 

"Just let me go Minkyu." Hyunwoo whispered. His voice hadn't been the same since the fight either. It was small and had no more self esteem and confidence behind it anymore. He wasn't lying when he said he felt empty. 

"No, stop running away." Hyunwoo felt tears coming from his eyes because he didn't know how long it had been since he hugged Minkyu. 

"Let's go back to class. Come on Hyunwoo." Hyunwoo nodded, turning around to walk back to class.

The teacher saw that he was crying and didn't ask like all the others in class. He sat down and put his head in arms. Everyone knew he was depressed and the class even had a discussion about him. Of course Hyunwoo didn't know that the teacher had told his classmates to be nice and Minkyu volunteered to sit next to him to make him feel at home. But that all didn't matter now and all he could do now was cry. Cry because he couldn't take this shit anymore.

"Hyunwoo talk to me after class please." The teacher said. Hyunwoo didn't respond not only because he didn't hear him but because he didn't care what this teacher had to say to him. This happened in every single class he went to.

"Hyunwoo, are you going to therapy?" Hyunwoo nodded.

"What's wrong?"

"I'm ok." Hyunwoo whispered he was tired of talking to teachers.

"Ok, get going then." Hyunwoo bowed again he hadn't realized he had been bowing all day in America and he didn't care now that he realized it.

"Bye." Hyunwoo left and closed the door softly behind him.

"Hyunwoo," he looked at Minkyu.

"Yes?" Minkyu reached out hugging Hyunwoo again. It made him confused but he just hugged him back and let go.

"Why are you so fucking depressed?" Minkyu asked, letting Hyunwoo go. Hyunwoo wanted to laugh at that the reason he was sad was because of Minkyu but he was to blind to even see it.

"I'm tired of going to this school because you're here and you act like I don't exist and Sungmin treats me like I'm a prize. You all act like I have a mental illness." Hyunwoo replied, feeling his anger rise. 

"You act like a saint. I know what you did." Hyunwoo stared at Minkyu.

"I'm sorry. I said I was sorry over the summer and now in school. I called you more times than I could count. Do you want me to say I shouldn't have kissed you?" Hyunwoo was crying again and he felt so weak all the time.

"I can't lie to you, and say I was thinking when I did both of those things. But I like you and you don't even look at me anymore Minkyu. I just want to be your friend again." Hyunwoo had tears flowing out of his eyes and he couldn't believe he was all out bawling at school. Minkyu started walking away. Hyunwoo couldn't even explain his feelings in the moment. Hyunwoo wiped away his tears, watched Minkyu's back as he walked away. He knew this was a shitty idea. To come to school like this. Hyunwoo sniffed, calling Sungmin.

"Hey Hyunie." Sungmin said brightly.

"Can you take me home?" Hyunwoo felt like a child asking all this help. He couldn't lie and say he didn't need it though.

"Sure where are you?" Sungmin sounded so beautiful and it made Hyunwoo want to cry again.

"Outside of classroom uh B-506." Hyunwoo whispered, sitting down by the door.

"Coming!" Hyunwoo hung up and put his head in his arms. He was so all over the place that he didn't even know where to start when it came to his problems.

"Where's Hyunwoo?!" Panic arose in his Mom's voice, he hated making her stressed but he really didn't want to go to school. The first day was really bad for him and now he had to go again.

"Check under the bed maybe in the closet." Hyunwoo gulped, would they find him? His mom looked under the bed and found nothing, she opened the closet doors and still nothing. He looked through the crack in the closet doors. 

"Is he in our room maybe, the other closet." His mom opened the doors and saw him stuffed into the small space of his bathroom closet and sighed.

"You're going to school, no more missed days Mr." Hyunwoo sighed and crawled out the closet. Other pain induced day. 

Lunch. After hours of work in school some would see this as a get away. Hyunwoo saw this as a goddamn trap. Hyunwoo glanced at his table from the exit doors this time. He had no food in hand and he was just staring at Minkyu and less of his table. Should he or should he not go talk to him again and cry for the 4th time today. He decided against it and slipped out into the school yard. He wasn't leaving because Minkyu specifically said "stop running away." He wanted to but instead he sat on the autumn ground outside and listened to Young J once more. He wasn't tired of his songs and he was more like a fan girl. Youngjin's songs were about his experiences and one was even about him. 

Hyunwoo just closed his eyes and let time pass. He couldn't do this forever.

"Hyunwoo sit down. Now." Hyunwoo sat down in the principal's office. The principal was loosing softness and was becoming more stern with him.

"Why were you off of school grounds? You are supposed to eat in the lunchroom." 

"I'm sorry I thought that I was still on school grounds. I was right outside the lunchroom, doesn't that count?" Hyunwoo asked.

"No, Hyunwoo I want you to talk to others at lunch. Socialize please or you're getting detention." Why would he get detention for not socializing?

"Why? I'm fine by myself." Hyunwoo whispered.

"Just talk to people. It will make you happier, trust me." Hyunwoo nodded. He talked to people yesterday wasn't that enough.

"You're dismissed." Hyunwoo left waving at the principal.

Hyunwoo sat down with a loud huff. He ran as fast as he could. Some boys were showing him a "vape" he had no idea what it was so asked more which led to him being late. And he didn't even get to take a hit or whatever they called it.

"You're late Hyunwoo! Detention!" Hyunwoo sighed. He was so tired he didn't care. He glanced next to him and Minkyu was right there so close yet so far.

"Why do you always get in trouble?" Minkyu asked after class.

"I don't know. I guess people are tired of seeing me fuck up." Hyunwoo replied softly. His voice was always soft these days.

"I'm tired of seeing you fuck up too." Hyunwoo nodded, putting his books into his bag.

"I wouldn't say I deserve it. Just that I had it coming. I wish I could turn back time but I'm not that stupid no matter how many times you guys call me stupid." Hyunwoo felt himself chuckle which he felt good about.

"You're not just stupid Hyunwoo. You're an idiot times 2." Hyunwoo giggled. Minkyu would say some stupid shit like that.

"You're right baby." Hyunwoo talked without sounding like a mouse and he was proud of himself.

"You don't get to call me that asshole." Minkyu said on a more serious note.

"You're the love of my life, what can I say. Minmin maybe?" Hyunwoo smirked glancing at Minkyu. His cheeks were bright red and Hyunwoo smiled at that.

"Shut up." Hyunwoo didn't know he was serious and immediately stopped talking.

"Sorry Minkyu. I know you're still angry, I shouldn't have-" Hyunwoo whispered, gently grabbing Minkyu's hand.

"Bye Hyunwoo." Minkyu ripped his hand away and left the classroom quickly.

"Why do you do this to me?! Where are you?! Stop trying not to go to school, I'll find you." Hyunwoo curled his knees up to his chest trying to avoid the piping. His phone rang loudly in his pocket and he sighed, another day at school.

"Hey Youngjin." Hyunwoo stepped into the building and Youngjin was already waiting.

"Hyunwoo, I'm releasing a new mixtape and you get first dibs." Hyunwoo's eyes lit up, a new mixtape?! 

"Thank you J, can we listen to it right now?" Hyunwoo said too excited to function properly. 

The lunchroom or detention again. He would rather go to lunch. He collected his courage and sat at his table. 

"Overwatch season 2! Look, look look." Jun basically yelled pulling out his phone like a nerd. Hyunwoo's eyes lit up more as the trailer video played.

"You're getting that exclusive right Minkyu." Hyunwoo asked, glancing at an already vacant seat next to him. How did he not even notice he had left?

"I already got it." Jun exclaimed, staring at the video. 

"I'm s-"

"That's gonna be sick." Youngjin interrupted. Hyunwoo just guessed that they were all tired of his shit which was understandable. He shook it off and just watched the video talking to his friends about the game.

"Hyunwoo! What is that?!" Hyunwoo looked from his lap, the teacher. 

"Um, well I have a paper I'm folding for geometry. You know how it goes." Hyunwoo tried to laugh it off and showed his hexagon to the class. 

"Put that away, this is chemistry." The teacher went back to the lesson and Hyunwoo sighed. Would he always hate science no matter who was in it with him? Hyunwoo wrote down some of what the teacher was saying but really didn't pay attention.

Hyunwoo felt someone's hand on his thigh and glanced at Minkyu who wasn't even looking at him.

"Hyunwoo what is the answer." Hyunwoo looked at the board and calculated the problem quickly.

"That's a trick question that is still unsolved."

"Come up to the board and explain." Hyunwoo nodded and got up to teach the class a stupid science formula when some of the kids began to giggle. He looked at their faces then at Minkyu who's checks were glowing red.

"Um, so the reason i-it." Hyunwoo cleared his throat and turned around to face the board. "Scientists h-have yet to discover a-an accurate answer to t-this formula. That's w-why i-it's unsolved." Hyunwoo finished by circling a question mark in the middle of the board. 

"Good job, sit back down, oh and Hyunwoo that's detention." What? This teacher was just handing out free detentions now? What was his deal?

"Um, ok." Hyunwoo whispered walking back to his seat. Hyunwoo didn't ask why, fearing he would get yet another detention. The class giggled again as he faced the class, Hyunwoo shook it off and sat down again. Minkyu's hand went back on his thigh and he wondered what his classmates were even laughing about.

"You had a boner." Minkyu whispered in his ear. His cheeks burned red hot. This was all too much.

"Are you buying the exclusive edition for us all to play?" Hyunwoo asked stacking the chairs.

"Yeah." Hyunwoo nodded. He was happy Minkyu was.

"I miss you." He glanced at Minkyu to see his reaction

"Why do you think he gave you detention?" Hyunwoo shrugged his shoulders stacking the last chair. Did he just completely ignore him?

"Can you come over?" Hyunwoo fidgeted with the "vape" he was given in his pocket. He still didn't really know why people used it.

"Are you going to fuck me like you did Sungmin?" Minkyu looked angry again and Hyunwoo didn't really understand him.

"No, I didn't even want to do that," Hyunwoo mumbled under his breath, "I want to hang out with you. Maybe watch something?" Hyunwoo clasped his hands together nervously.

"No, you get out of detention at 4PM and I have things to do." Hyunwoo sighed and tried not to show his already disappointed face.

"Like what? I just want to hang out with you like old times. Before what happened, you know?" Hyunwoo put his backpack on and faced Minkyu.

"The world doesn't revolve around you Hyunwoo. Enjoy detention." Hyunwoo stepped closer to Minkyu giving him a tight hug. 

"Bye baby." Hyunwoo whispered, pulling away. Minkyu cheeks were bright red and it made Hyunwoo smile.

"I told you not to call me that." Minkyu complained.

"You didn't say that when we kissed or cuddled Minmin. Why won't you forgive me?" Hyunwoo made these little steps forward each day but it never seemed to work.

"That's because I liked you. Then you went and did freaky shit behind my back." Minkyu was mad now and Hyunwoo knew he would just get more mad if he kept talking.

"I did that not after I kissed you but before. Not like that makes a difference though. I still was shitty for liking two people at the same time." Hyunwoo chuckled a bit.

"Yeah that was shitty, I don't know how Sungmin still treats you like a best friend." Minkyu rolled his eyes and adjusted his backpack strap.

"And what's wrong with treating your friend like something. Or even straight up rejection which I still haven't gotten from the both of you." Hyunwoo looked around the empty classroom then back at Minkyu.

"You want me to reject you? Hyunwoo that makes no sense at all." Minkyu said trying to get around Hyunwoo.

"I-I really like you. And when we were figuring it out I was so confused because Sungmin said at the same time, 'I was never told that you liked me.' Or 'I thought you liked Woo-shik back then.' It was confusing and I still don't know which is the truth-"

"If you ever believed the shit he said you're an idiot, especially after he called you a…" He called him a what? Hyunwoo just wanted to strangle Minkyu's inner Jun and make him say it.

"What did he call me besides an annoying, obsessed piece of shit." Hyunwoo giggled. Thinking back to it he didn't like to talk about it but he didn't care right now.

"He said all of that and you still wanted to be with him?" Hyunwoo looked off to the side a bit.

"No, I felt like it was my younger self telling me that it was a perfect opportunity and like it was me before all the stuff happened."

"Why are you even telling me this?" Minkyu asked. 

"I guess I want to prove my worth to you. I don't want to be a pile of shit to you anymore. I figured I should just be open." Minkyu stared at him. By the way Minkyu looked he knew he was going to change the subject again.

"If you didn't like him then and if was your younger self why did you have sex with him?"

"I don't want to make him seem like the bad guy but I was convinced through a series of pleas and peer pressure." Hyunwoo laughed thinking back on his dad catching them. If only he had caught them a second time. He did get caught, technically but that just led to what happened.

"Can you tell me what he called me?" Hyunwoo asked. Minkyu sighed and glanced at Hyunwoo.

"He called you a f word. I can't say it because I just don't want to." 

"Oh, I've been called that so many times it's a bit numb to me." Hyunwoo sat on top of a desk and looked at Minkyu. He looked so beautiful.

"When have you been called that so many times?" Hyunwoo remembered he hadn't told them about his school after he transferred.

"When I transferred the news spread over schools, it was much worse than you guy's school. That's why I didn't say much that summer." Hyunwoo whispered. He didn't know how Minkyu would react to that.

"Oh, you're ok now right." Hyunwoo nodded.

"You asked me if I was ok…" Hyunwoo mumbled.

"I asked if you were ok, and? Hyunwoo we can be friends like you were saying but I don't think we can be together." Hyunwoo nodded.

"Can I keep trying to make you mine? What do you want me to do?" Hyunwoo whispered feeling like he just feel off his wall.

"If you haven't figured out what to do to get me back, you're really an idiot." Minkyu said leaving the class. What does he want from him?

"Hyunwoo you didn't hide today." Hyunwoo nodded getting into his mom's car.

"I figured I was stressing you too much. I'm sorry for getting detention too. This one teacher keeps singling me out."

"Ask them why Hyunboo." Hyunwoo nodded.

"Mom, what is this vape? Some kids at school gave it me and told me to take a hit." His mom grabbed it and threw it out the window.

"That is a e-cigarette." Hyunwoo nodded feeling stupid that he didn't know that.

Lunch wasn't hard anymore he sat at his table and now Minkyu didn't leave. They were becoming more of friends again but Minkyu put a boundary up like he couldn't get past just friends. Whenever he did more than the playful hit or grabbing his hand to do a gesture he was kneed or kicked under the table. For example he tried to wrap his arm around Minkyu's waist which he was quickly kicked for. He was in so much pain by the end of lunch.

"Hyunwoo." Sungmin touched his shoulder and he turned around to face him. It was between classes and he hadn't talked to Sungmin in awhile.

"Hey Sungmin." Hyunwoo exclaimed feeling weird talking to him like this.

"Why didn't you come over yesterday?" Hyunwoo forgot to tell him.

"Sorry I forgot to tell you I got detention for basically no reason in my last period." 

"Do you want to hang out today?" Hyunwoo thought about it and nodded.

"I can't be what you want me to be though. I'm just a friend. Like we were before I transferred." Sungmin nodded.

"Bye." Sungmin hugged him tightly and Hyunwoo patted his back slowly.

"Bye bestie." Hyunwoo immediately regretted his decision to try and be cool. Sungmin just walked away and he felt good with the decision he made.

"Hyunwoo, do you know why I gave you detention yesterday?"

"N-no sir." Hyunwoo had just come into class on time and this teacher singled him out again.

"You failed to pay attention to detail three times. It's not just about your smarts it's about paying attention to detail." Hyunwoo nodded.

"I'll keep that in mind sir." Hyunwoo sat down next to Minkyu and sighed. Paying attention to detail. Was there some detail that he missed. Was that why Hyunwoo still wasn't forgiven? He leaned on Minkyu expecting to get elbowed or it hit but that didn't happen so he cherished this touch and watched as the teacher taught what he already knew. Midway through the class he wrapped his arms around Minkyu's waist and buried his head into his shoulder. He knew he would kicked so he cherished the three seconds of warmth from Minkyu's body.

"Hyunwoo start us off reading." Pay attention to detail. Hyunwoo let go of Minkyu and read the passage from the book.

"When dealing with chemistry one must pay attention to detail. Whether that's a formula for a new medication or your love life." Hyunwoo looked up at the teacher.

"Keep reading." Hyunwoo nodded and read again.

"People are always never listening and thinking of what to say next. In chemistry it about reading and paying attention. If one thing is off the whole thing could blow up in your face."

"Now if I give you detention one more time will you finally pay attention." Hyunwoo looked around the classroom and they were all staring at him.

"What are you asking me to pay attention to sir?" Hyunwoo asked. 

"My class and the things I say. This whole class you haven't written down one note." Hyunwoo nodded.

"At home try to think about how chemistry affects you with love chemistry or simple formulas. Hand in a 5 page essay by monday next week. This assignment is only for Hyunwoo." Hyunwoo sighed and looked at his blank journal. How did he not notice he wrote down no notes. How did he even remember everything when nothing was written down? Hyunwoo took out his pencil and began to write.

"What are you doing after school?" Minkyu asked after class.

"Gotta work on this dumb essay. I really wish I payed more attention so I didn't get this assignment." Hyunwoo said putting his chair.

"You should pay more attention in general Hyun." Hyunwoo sighed. He was right but he didn't like how it was Minkyu telling him that.

"You're right. Like honestly I am pretty selfish." 

"Pretty much." Minkyu whispered.

"Um, I should go. Bye." Hyunwoo hugged Minkyu and left silently. 

"So you need to talk about your love life with the teacher? That doesn't sound good to me?"

"Well he didn't say I had to, he talked about formulas too. That's not enough for 5 pages though. It's like he is forcing me to like, I don't know." Hyunwoo said jotting down the first part of his paper about how formulas affected him. 

"Just finish the first section and then just right down who you love and your chemistry with those people." Hyunwoo nodded agreeing.

"So I just have to write about my friends and my chemistry. That seems like less drama than talking about the person I love." Hyunwoo whispered smiling.

"Who do you love though?" Hyunwoo glanced at Sungmin then at his paper.

"It's complicated but I bet I could write about my lost love and how the chemistry changed. I don't want to talk about who I love right now though."

"That's understandable." After he wrote the first three pages they played minecraft and Hyunwoo went home.

"Your paper Hyunwoo." Hyunwoo handed the teacher the paper and sat down in his seat.

"Minkyu." Hyunwoo whined, hugging Minkyu close. It had been a long weekend and he stayed up until 3 am writing like a maniac.

"What happened?" Hyunwoo made a whiney sound and just closed his eyes.

"You are a big baby, I swear Hyunwoo." Minkyu giggled with Hyunwoo. Hyunwoo let go of him and his dark circles showed.

"I didn't get any sleep. I pulled an all nighter writing that essay." Hyunwoo whined sitting back in his chair.

"What did you write about?" Hyunwoo cheeks became pink and he glanced at Minkyu.

"Well, chemistry formulas and such." Hyunwoo whispered fiddling with his fingers. Minkyu giggled and kicked Hyunwoo.

"I wrote about who I love and the chemistry between me and them." Hyunwoo added nodding his head weirdly.

"Who do you love?" Hyunwoo looked around the bustling classroom and back at Minkyu.

"You're going to have to read my paper." Hyunwoo whispered sitting back in his chair.

"I bet it's Sungmin." Minkyu said sourly.

"Guess again." Hyunwoo chuckled. Minkyu just looked at him then at the board.

"Class, class settle down. As you know Hyunwoo has written a paper about figurative and real chemistry. I briefly skimmed over the story and I would like each person in the class to come up and read a line from the paper."

"What?" Hyunwoo mumbled. He was ok with people reading his paper but separately and privately. Not all together. This teacher really didn't like him.

"Guess like we will find out." Minkyu whispered. 

"Who wants to go first? How about Hyunwoo since you wrote it tell us a meaningful line from your paper.

"Uh, o-ok." Hyunwoo stood up and walked to the front of class. 

"Well this line has a lot of meaning to me, so here I go. 'Our chemistry was most fleeting then and now it's like empty hallways and fields that were once populated are barren. We work like opposites who want different things, but at the exact same time we live off each other's energy. Are you the same or different? All I know is that you are my bestfriend.' That's it thank you." Hyunwoo bowed and started to walk back to his seat.

"Who were you talking about?" Hyunwoo glanced at Minkyu and knew he was going to be mad.

"I wanted to keep it private but, that line was about my friend Sungmin. There are many other people I talk about in the essay." Hyunwoo said.

"When I looked at it the main person you talk about is Minkyu, am I right?" Hyunwoo nodded.

"That was great who is next." Hyunwoo sat down next to Minkyu and let out a sigh of relief.

"Why did you choose the one about Sungmin if all people?" Minkyu asked.

"I didn't want to talk about you because you're right here so I had to think about a different one." Hyunwoo explained.

The other kids went and it seemed like his class was very intrigued with his paper. No one had read the last page which he was thankful for. He told the teacher that he didn't want anybody to read from there and he respected his wishes for the most part.

"Minkyu your last and I want you to focus on the last page."

"But-but I said no one could read from there-" Hyunwoo spoke out finally.

"Can he read it in his head? Then pick just one sentence to read. Your paper was excellent, don't discourage yourself Hyunwoo." 

"Ok, he can read it." Minkyu looked at him weirdly and walked to the front of the classroom. Minkyu looked like he was reading it and Hyunwoo held his breath. Minkyu glanced at Hyunwoo then back at the paper.

"Did you choose a line?" Minkyu nodded. Hyunwoo could see he was uncertain after reading it and it made Hyunwoo uneasy.

"So he said, 'L-loving them is like loving a wall. Whatever I do t-they block me out. It's almost like they're something I'll n-never catch in one lifetime alone. That is why everyday I try to reach them. My chemistry with them is like a broken heart searching for It's pieces again. W-we both scavenge everyday for the fragments of our broken hearts, because there isn't a day we can imagine being without each other." Minkyu finished handing the paper back to the teacher. Minkyu looked uncertain and uncomfortable which made Hyunwoo unsettled.

"Thank you Minkyu." Minkyu walked back to his seat and sat down next to Hyunwoo.

"Why would you write that about me?" Minkyu whispered, turning to Hyunwoo.

"Are you ok? Your crying." Hyunwoo reached out wiping away Minkyu's tears.

"Y-you love me?" Hyunwoo sighed, wiping away Minkyu's tears.

"Yes, I love you." Hyunwoo whispered. He knew he wouldn't say it back. How could he feel the same when they had just become friends again. This was exactly why he didn't want him to read his paper. He was crying because of him.

"I want you guys to think about Hyunwoo's paper and write me a paragraph about it. It's due tomorrow. I'll let you guys out early. Have a good day." Everyone in the class got up packing their things. Hyunwoo stood up and packed his things and Minkyu still sat there.

"Minkyu let's go." Hyunwoo whispered, pulling Minkyu out of his seat.

"I love you too Hyunwoo." Hyunwoo's eyes lit up. He loved him? He felt like the wall finally fell and Minkyu was finally letting him in. Hyunwoo hugged Minkyu tight. And he finally felt redeemed. 

Hyunwoo pulled back and looked deep into Minkyu's eyes. He loved him and he felt so happy finally after so long. His strife and anguish forgotten and he only felt lucky to be in Minkyu's presence. Hyunwoo leaned forward his lips pressing onto Minkyu. It was like their first kiss, sweet and to be cherished as innocent. Hyunwoo let himself smile as he pulled away, he finally felt redeemed.

**Author's Note:**

> The theme I tried to capture in this book is to pay attention to detail. In this story Hyunwoo was so drawn to Sungmin that he failed to pay attention to detail. It's shown even when they all meet in 7th grade. Minkyu is drawn to him and it is only made visible to Hyunwoo freshmen year. He was missing the love that was actually right in front of him, being manipulated and chasing after someone who didn't love him.


End file.
